THE CONSERVATIVE HIPSTERS

Wee Stacey

At least she didn't have very far to fall. So, wee Stacey J. has been given the boot. I can't say I'm suprised. First, let us quickly summarize the episode. As to be expected, the Big D shuffled the teams, mixing plugs and sockets together. I liked how he chose to do it--he brought them immediately into the Boardroom right after he fired John, made them choose a Project Manager on the spot and then made the PMs pick three "teammates" that they would NOT like to keep on their team, who were then sent to the other team. Ah, the cold sting of rejection.

So, how best to soothe that rejection? Have a friendly confab with your new team members. Everyone seemed to get along. They all seemed to agree. Well, on one thing anyway--Stacey J. is friggin' annoying.

Anyway, this time the task was to run a doggie care business (could be anything--doggie grooming, doggie washing, snoop doggie dogging, whatever). Who ever made the most money won. The new Apex, managed by the (apparently) hot Jennifer M., got right to work. They decided to wash dogs in Central Park for the afternoon. Mosaic, led by "Maestro Fresh" Wes (you have to be Canadian--or just know me--to get that one) got right to dithering. And then grooming. The dogs.

I'll fast forward for you--on both teams, a few worked hard, a few flailed around, a few stood around looking hot (Maria, I'm looking in your direction). I guess when you're exempt, why waste good effort on helping your team? The teams basically took the same approach. The only difference was one team washed, the other groomed. I was having a hard time remembering which one was which. Just get me to the Boardroom, already.

So we're in the Boardroom. Mosaic loses. Apex gets to go meet Giuilani's Wal-Mart grade clone, NY Mayor Michael Bloomberg. Raj kisses ass. Wesley gets to pick: he chooses "Loud things come in small packages" Stacey J and perenial Boardroom guest "Hey! I'm not a virgin" Andy. For once I actually agreed with only bringing in 2 candidates. Maria was exempt, and the other two didn't really deserve to be in there, as they worked hard.

Right from the beginning, you knew Stacey was cooked. Firstly, because "Marky" Mark Burnett kept showing clips of people talking about how annoying Stacey J is. Secondly, because Carolyn couldn't tell what she was doing suring the task, besides rolling up her sleeves and standing at the table (well, she could have been sitting. Oh wait, I could still see her head. She was standing.)

So, Wes, who always seems to have some role in the failure of his team, was called a "complete disaster" by DT. I think its safe to say he won't be making the final cut. Andy lost the team cell phone, which 2004 "Uptight Accountant Stereotype Award" winner and George stand-in Allen Whoever saw as a mistake so large it would have "wiped out an entire brigade" if this was a war zone. C'mon, Big Al--wars? In this day and age? A little over the top, especially for America, don't you think?

The Big D said he didn't like the fact that Stacey didn't take responsibility for anything. She didn't help herself when DT asked her if she felt responsible for the team's loss in any way and she said no. Lioness Carolyn, picking up the scent of blood in the air, decided to once again go for the throat: "I'm still trying to figure out what you do around here". Stacey tried to mount a defence, but she was obviously overwhelmed by the size of the chair she was sitting in. That would throw anyone off; its hard to have your feet firmly on the ground when you can't touch the floor.

So Stacey gets fired. My favorite point was after the wee pile-on and as they're leave to take the long elevator ride back, Wes goes in for the "go team" hug. Stacey recoils back like a sorority gal that's spent the better part of the night at a kegger getting her ass slapped by drunken frat boys. Ah, Wes. It started with your name and its just been downhill from there, eh? Get used to the rejection.

I think its starting to get down to the cream of the crop now. We're seeing the loose cannons and the drooling idiots being shotgunned. The somewhat competent (yet disturbingly homogenous) remaining contestants need to step up their game.

Now, if only they'd fire Ivana.